Day 19: Summer

Flowing…going with the flow and being in the moment. That is what I’m doing this week and am loving having the time and space to flow, even though I find it challenging to let go of schedules, expectations and control.

Tonight we ate dinner at 9pm, after Christian prepared it for us. We never eat this late, but tonight this is what flow felt like and we flowed, eating on the couches in the family room sharing crazy, chaotic, interrupted conversations.

Tonight I caught up with an old friend in between drop off and pick up points, because I’ve missed her and was curious enough to text and attempt to connect at the last minute and she said, YES!  This is what flow felt like in the moment of not being too busy! It was great to give her and her girls hugs and to share a few moments together.

I could get used to this perfectly imperfectly unstructured summer and can’t believe we are almost 3 weeks in already. Where does the time go?

Life is good, especially when we flow.


Pure Joy

Charlie and I were excited all day for this. We were anticipating finishing our day and packing up our duffle bags for an overnight stay with our BFFs. We stopped at 7-11 to buy snacks and popping cap guns.

I’m only sharing this picture that Charlie took on our ride down south because I want to hold on to the other memories in my mind.

I loved that from the moment we stepped out of the car, Charlie was already running away with his BFF.  We did see them now and then and got to share in some of their joy. Like when they decided to be polar bears and dared each other to jump into the freezing, cold pool. Boys will be boys and we laughed and enjoyed their antics.

Listening to friends and watching them interact is the best gift. They adore each other and got into a state of flow in 2 seconds, just like their mamas. We picked up where we left off, happy to be together again.

Pure joy, just being together.

These are the days…life is good.

Have a good weekend, BeLoveRs.

One Word

If you were to pick one word to represent your hopes and desires for this new year, what would you pick?

Last year my theme was “let go” which is actually two words, but I came back to these ALL the time. Whenever I lost my focus, I would remind myself to let go and adapt and to accept what was presenting itself to me. I practiced letting go of expectations that stood in the way of my ability to feel joy. By letting go, I freed myself to be ok with what was and not what I was hoping for if that makes any sense. By letting go, I let other people be too. It allowed me to release judgement which was strange and liberating at the same time. Of course, I wasn’t always good at this process, but when I was, it worked to create happiness not only for myself but also for the person who was “disappointing” me.

For example, I let go of the expectation that my husband would be home at a given time. I let go of the need to receive acknowledgement from texts right away and didn’t feel like the other person was ignoring me. I was patient and let go of the imaginary expected time they had to respond. This is liberating! When friends had to change plans at the last minute, I let them do what they needed to do without expressing any regret and made other plans. I think the ability to let go and adapt are critical skills to enabling our happiness.

The year before my word was “flow.” I wanted to learn to flow with whatever came my way and to be less controlling. This worked wonders for creating inner peace. I share these ideas in case they might ignite a spark in you too.

This year I’ve chosen my word to be “togetherness.” I want to be present and enjoy my time with my family and close friends, and put my phone down more often than not.

My challenge is finding the experiences that all 5 of us might be interested in sharing at the same time, which gets more challenging as everyone gets busier. I also want to be more flexible and organic in allowing life to flow and to live in the moment without having to “do” anything, if that makes any sense.

Some of the things we like to do as a family include: driving, going to the beach, barbecuing, traveling, seeing new places, going out to eat, visiting friends, cooking together, tailgating and watching sporting events, entertaining, watching tv, playing on our phones and sharing stories, taking pictures, and hanging out with each other, friends, and family.

What is your word or two that summarizes some of your goals this coming year?

Happy New Year 2015!

Transitions and Surprises

We all go through transitions every day. Nothing stays the same, which is so obvious, but for some reason I think that someday things will be normal, but normal never comes, whatever that may be. And a new normal takes its place, which is normal and to be expected but it’s not! And I think that’s crazy.

Why do we expect things to stay the same or to reach a steady state? That’s probably just stupid thinking, but we do it anyway. And as soon as we think we’re ready to start something new, something else changes that we weren’t expecting. Hopefully one day I’ll stop being surprised.

I shared with my husband that we should expect 5 things to go wrong at home, 4 things to go wrong at work and 7 things to not go as planned with the kids. Don’t ask me where I got these numbers. I just made them up. My point was/is that we always really seem surprised when things didn’t go as expected, so I told him maybe if we changed our expectations and expected things to not go as planned, we’d feel more happy and not so surprised and have less drama. Really what I was sharing with him was what I’m trying to tell and teach myself so that I can flow with whatever comes my way and not feel like I’ve been given such a surprise. That makes sense, right?

So my new normal is to have a plan and then expect it to change and transition and flow with it, whatever it may be and to not feel so surprised or perplexed.

Like tonight. I planned to go to bed early and did all the work to be ready on time, but 3 things went wrong at home that changed my plan, and by wrong I mean differently than I had planned, which is really normal and not wrong, but just kept me up later than expected. Phew… did you follow all that?

I was going to write tonight about my parents leaving and the feelings of saying goodbye and transitioning again, but then the words took over and changed, along with the intent of this post, but I’ll just go with it. My new normal.

What’s your new normal?



Day 93 – Happy Birthday, Friend!


Everyone should have a “wife”. By a wife, I mean someone to help you with the FLOW of raising kids, cleaning up after them, cooking and baking and feeding and entertaining, and solving every day little crises, watching one another’s kids on the playground or while running an errand or doctor’s appointment, and celebrating the highs and lows together. This is a great thing, and something I am going to miss more than I care to think about in 93 days.

Today’s HER birthday and she came over and helped ME fold laundry. What the heck?!?  What a great way to spend a birthday, right?  That is, after we spent an hour+ helping all our kids do homework and to share every last tidbit of the juicy pineapple we cut up for them.  But really, I think it was a great day. Actually I think when doing work and getting things done, and helping one another, whether it be my work or her work, I’m totally happy. I like taking care of our kids and helping each other so we don’t have to do it alone and the kids are happy to be playing with each other.  Thank you for MY birthday gift? Huh?

Granted, I should have been at HER house folding HER laundry, but then my little guy wouldn’t have had his baseball uniform picked out of my 10 basket-fulls in time for his early evening game. Isn’t that what friends are for? I’ll be over tomorrow to help you with YOURS. Happy Birthday, and thank you for being my friend and “wife”.