nAMaste at the End of the Day

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It’s been killing me to not write tonight. I gave myself permission not to, which is all I needed. I felt free!! And my spark came back.

I was feeling sad today about giving up my creative outlet. I made a really nice dinner and thought my cooking was my creative outlet and I enjoyed being in the moment chopping green beans and slicing flank steak across the grain for the stir fry I was preparing. I felt joy in taking the time to cook for my family and hoped they would appreciate my gift, which they all did.

But the real gift came when sitting with Juliana, eating dinner just the two of us before our evening events.

I told her about my blog post last night and she was shocked and told me that she thought I was making a bad choice. She reminded me about how much I love writing and how it’s been the consistent thing I do every day and how it’s been the common thread since before we moved to Amsterdam. She reminded me that it’s my “nAMaste at the end of the day” and it’s my mindfulness practice and time to reflect. That girl makes me think and my mind is open to her opinion, even when hers is different than mine.  Although, she just brought out the truth I was hiding. She was right. 

As we sat and chatted together, Zuma came and parked herself on my lap. This is the cat that doesn’t want to be held and does her own thing and doesn’t want to be bothered. Yet last night and today, she came and sat on me and made me sit still. I wanted to move and do work, yet I stayed and listened to her too. When I tried to take her picture, she hid in my lap and made me smile.  

 Sometimes you need to slow down and just be. So I did.

And tonight when I thought I wasn’t going to write, I saw Cassie’s story circles post on Facebook. She does the same thing that I do every night, except she reflects on her day through art and she does it every night after the house quiets down. It’s her ritual, just like mine. She shows up and takes time for herself, being creative and doing what she loves, even when she’s tired.

So Juliana and Cassie, thank you for inspiring me to keep writing. I’m not ready to stop tonight. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe not. Just knowing that I have the freedom to not write on any given night is a gift. Isn’t it weird how we make up our own rules and change them? I’ll leave you with that thought…

nAMaste at the end of the day.

xo

Running Out of Words

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I’ve been writing daily for almost 4 years. That’s crazy to me! I’ve hardly missed a day in all that time, even when on vacation.

I’m starting to feel like I’m out of words and new experiences to share, which might be okay, actually.

Here I Am has been about being in the moment, seeing the good, living life to the fullest every day and sharing my journey with you, hoping to inspire and connect along the way.  My story feels like it is stable and is repeating now, which is a good thing and yet is kinda boring to write about. At least daily. And it’s taking me more time to think about being creative and sharing something meaningful each day, so I’m going to pay attention to the signs and change my daily ritual and let go of the expectation to write every day, which scares me a bit. I hope you don’t mind. I still plan on writing, just not every day.

I’ve begun working this year and my days are quite full now. I have less free time which makes me appreciate the quiet time in the evening even more. 

I’m excited to discover how I’ll fill the gap. I have some ideas, but maybe just maybe I’ll get to sleep a little earlier, which I definitely could use.

So thank you for reading with me all these days! I hope you’ll still keep following me as I figure out a new routine. 🙂 

nAMaste 

Bubble Gum Alley

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Some things are just really gross, yet we are still drawn to them. Isn’t that weird?  Take a peek at Bubble Gum Alley in San Luis Obispo.  Who thought this would become a thing and stick?  Haha!  No pun intended. Humans are really, really weird creatures, myself included.

How many thousands of people have walked through this same hall and added their chewed wad of bubble gum to the wall of fame? How do you choose where to add your part?  And who started this mess and told a friend who told two friends, who told their friends and so forth. Look how thick the wall is??  EEW.
 We first stopped at Rocket Fizz on the corner, to get a juicy pack of gum before walking over to add to the art exhibit. I just observed this time and enjoyed watching their reactions and prayed that they didn’t actually touch any of the spit germs surrounding them.  I think they were mildly grossed out too. But that’s probably half the fun – kind of like getting spooked out at a haunted house.  For some reason, we like to get out of our comfort zone for a moment or two. Maybe it’s the thrill and excitement of experiencing something gross and fun at the same time that draws people here. Maybe it’s the shared tradition. And maybe once we experience the grossness, we can appreciate all that is clean and normal that normally surrounds us that we don’t even notice. Yin and yang.

If you’re in San Luis Obispo, you too can experience this great tradition. Bring your gum and stop by off Higuera Street, near Broad Street.

😉  Adriana

 

 

Beach Time

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So chill…up early, out on the beach and in the surf.   
      
The water was so cold, that we rented a wet suit.  


It was too bad we didn’t have all day to stay and play and chill with our friends. I love the laid back, relaxing feel of the beach vibe. Seeing the kids in the water and dipping my feet in brought back my carefree, childhood sweet memories.

Life is good, especially on the beach, which is the best place to BE.

nAMaste

 

My Happy Place

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After spending several days with family, eating and drinking and just being together, we are spending our last day of vacation recharging at my other happiest place on earth, the beach. 

We got here in time to see the sun setting behind the clouds. Isn’t it just so peaceful to see?

After an early dinner and watching the first half of the Stanford / Notre Dame game, I took the kids swimming and sat by the fire for hours while Jeff and Christian enjoyed watching Stanford win in the final five seconds of the game. Our friends are also staying at the same hotel, which made our shared experience even better.   

They even had s’mores and hot chocolate for the kids and big kids alike. We are so lucky! 

 
This is what happiness feels like and looks like to me.
What does happiness feel like and look like to you?
I wish you well.

nAMaste

Being Sick And Being Quiet

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My extended family has been together for days. We didn’t just come together for Thanksgiving, but the day before and the day after too.

My parents are amazing hosts and always welcoming to everyone. And everyone comes to be together. It’s quite amazing to be a part of and to observe.

I’ve had a cold for what seems like a week, so I’ve been more of a quiet observer which has been fascinating. I tend to have lots of opinions but this week I’ve practiced letting things be, and not reacting and not having an opinion and it’s been wonderful to go with the flow and to be quiet and to listen.

I’m not saying I like being sick, but I did enjoy being more of a listener than an entertainer and I sure enjoyed the family members who were quite good at sharing stories and jokes. I also enjoyed watching all the kids play together and doing the dishes quietly.

These are the simple things I enjoyed today while being sick and quiet. Oh, and I enjoyed the 3.3 mile walk with my sister and noticed all of the acorns on the ground, while walking in the fresh air. It was good to get out of the house and to exercise.

How was your day after Thanksgiving? Hope you are well.

Life is good, even when you’re sick.

nAMaste

 

Giving Thanks

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Happy Thanksgiving Day! 

I am thankful for the hike my family went on together this morning with family and friends.

I am thankful for my parents being such gracious and giving hosts and opening up their home to loved ones, bringing us all together for a shared meal.

I am thankful for the gathering and the solitude now at the end of the day. 

Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family. May you be blessed with love, food and friendship.

nAMaste

Efficiency

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Going back to work has made me a lot more efficient with my time and it’s fascinating how much I can get done in a compressed amount of time.

When you don’t have pressure to get things done quickly, you simply don’t. Or at least, I don’t. Typically, I like to flow with the day and to not rush and to get things done in a more relaxed fashion.

  
Before as a full time stay at home mom, it would take me all day to get out of bed, clean the house,  workout, shower, make dinner, shop, run an errand or two, check email and social media channels and perhaps volunteer or meet a friend for coffee or lunch before my real job began at 2:30 when the kids came home.

Now that I’m working, I have become more efficient with my time and get things done compressed all together consecutively at once.

For example, this morning I had coffee, read the paper, made lunches, cleaned the kitchen and made dinner before showering and driving Juliana to school at 8 am. By 9:30, I had gone to the car dealer, stopped at the store to buy suede spray for my boots, sprayed them, did my hair and makeup and stopped at the dry-cleaners on my way to work.

I worked my half day and then went shopping for the holidays with the last half of the afternoon before joining the kids back at home at 5:30 pm, thanks to the carpool friends. I sorted through the mail, wrote a check for a school event, caught up again on a few work emails and warmed up dinner before heading out for the evening date and appointment with Juliana.

If I want to get my work hours in and keep my personal life and house life running, I have to plan ahead and utilize all the minutes and the hours. I tend to like this pressure because I seem to get more done. I do miss the carefree days, but not as much as I am enjoying working.

So for now, life is good – working part time and figuring out the work/personal/volunteer/home life balance.

How does your life flow? What works well for you? Are you happy with your balanced or unbalanced days? I’m curious.

Wishing you well.  nAmAste.  xoxo