I Am White

I am white, privileged they say. I am so much more than my skin color and so are you. I never refer to myself as white except on forms, and it’s uncomfortable to me to talk about race because I prefer to think of us all as humans, part of the human race.

I think I was the only white girl in my yoga class today in Silicon Valley. I was aware of our differences and being a minority, but this is normal to me where I live as there are 26 different languages spoken at the homes of the children in our local school.

At the end of our class, our teacher asked all 20+ of to sit in a circle. As it’s the week of Thanksgiving, she wanted us to take a moment to say our name and introduce ourselves to one another and share one thing we are thankful for. There were people of Chinese, Japanese, Mexican, Indian,and European descents, that I could recognize and I’m sure there were more.

As we went around the circle, several names I cannot remember as they are different from the names I am familiar with and have never heard before. What was the same between us though, were our gifts of gratitude. We all expressed thanks for similar things such as family, health, love, our work, our beautiful lives and being present and thankful for our yoga class and instructor.

I Am privileged because I was surrounded by all these wonderful people who are different than me and yet we are the same. I felt a connection in our little, diverse yoga community. I see these people every week, but we don’t usually speak to one another, as it’s a one hour yoga class and I do not know the others. Sitting in this circle and sharing something about ourselves made a connection for me and for this I was thankful.

I Am in love with humanity and all that is good in all of us.

I Am sad for all who are in pain and suffering, and especially those in Ferguson.

Love sees no color.

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We all want the same things and we need to do the work to create the things we love. I want us all to be on the same team.

I Am sad that there are inequalities and unfairness in the world.

I was listening to Dj Boogie D from St. Louis this morning on NPR, as he was responding to the unrest in Ferguson. He said that we need to change and look forward, despite what has happened in the past, and he didn’t know what that change looked like just yet and was using his airways on the radio station to let peoples’ voices be heard.

I want to be part of the positive change in this world. We can celebrate our oneness, our sameness by embracing and seeing the good in each other and changing the conversation to lift each other up, to forgive one another and to help one another. I think we can take care of each other by being kind, loving, and respectful to ourselves and to each other, always, even when someone hurts us. I think this change comes from being curious about each other and wanting to know more and looking for the connections in our shared values and interests.

I wish for love and peace and justice in this fragmented world, BeLoveRs.

Namaste…the light in me honors the light in you.

Thank You

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It’s Thanksgiving week and I just want to say thank you for being here.

Thank you for your comments and opinions, both expressed online and privately.

I appreciate all of you who, and especially those of you who take the time to like my posts and write and share your thoughts with me.

I love that you’re reading and liking what you see and connecting. You inspire me and I thank you for that.

I love hearing that you’re sharing my stories with your daughters.  I love that you’re carrying the conversation and making it yours. We’re connecting and I absolutely LOVE this.

We have so much to be thankful for, despite our chaotic, imperfect, and painful lives.

So thank you for being you. Thank you for reading and writing, sharing and connecting. I appreciate each of you.

I hope you enjoy your families, good food and good health. Lots of love, and Happy Thanksgiving from California.

xo Adriana

Giving Thanks

I just got the Thanksgiving box down on Monday. In the box, I found some of our Thanksgiving thankfulness projects. We haven’t done something every year, but I do have a few mementos. In 2003, we made foam trees. I must have been inspired by a preschool project.

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In 2004, we were thankful that Charlie survived and didn’t take the time to create another project.

In 2005, we made placemats with each of our homemade trees of thanks. They are sitting around our table now and we are all getting a kick out of what we were thankful for back then.

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In 2006, we made bookmarks. I have these hanging on a mirror in another hallway.

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We must have been really busy living and were not that creative in the past 8 years!!  This year we are settling again and are ready for another thankfulness project.

We looked on Pinterest, and both Juliana and I gravitated independently toward the same 3D tree idea. This morning the aha light went on, and after yoga I went to the craft store to get supplies and came home and began building our Thankful Tree to surprise the kids before they came home.

Later while I was out running errands, Charlie decided to adopt the tree and made it his own. He decided our tree needed birds, and proceeded to find the ones he liked, printed them, cut them out and attached them to our tree before asking what anyone thought of his idea. I loved his creativity and independence, even though this idea was NOT on pinterest and was NOT mine! Juliana was clearly bothered by his creative freedom and wanted them removed. Even though I preferred our simple tree idea, I loved his personal touch and ownership of our family project and I didn’t want to take away from his creativity. The birds stayed.  

We are creating our leaves of thanks and adding them as we think of ideas. I can’t wait to see how our tree grows.

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We have so much to be thankful for. I hope the tree is overflowing in abundance and I wish you happiness, good health and peace.

What are you thankful for this year?

xo Happy Thanksgiving next week!  xo

Veteran’s Day – Veterans and Honor

We had the best conversation with Jeff’s 94 year old Granddad tonight to honor him on Veteran’s Day. The kids and I called him and he shared that he was asked to speak at the Air Force academy because they wanted to talk with someone who knew General Patton.  Colonel Hughes worked with Patton and even had dinner at his house.  I’m sure the cadets were in awe meeting and hearing first hand from a WWII Legend, who is so humble and inspiring.

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He told us that he was also asked to share his knowledge about the West Point Honor Code as the cadets at the Air Force Academy also had a code of conduct that they held high and were required to enforce amongst themselves and their peers.  I shared with him that I chose to marry my husband and his grandson for several reasons, and one of these included his sincere regard for the honor code that he believed in and practiced during his days at West Point.  The honor code is like getting a receipt, that you’re marrying an honest and trustworthy person that is honorable to himself, to his peers and to his country. I was hoping that these principles would apply to marriage as well, and I was right.

I think that if we all upheld an honor code and knew that we shared this code of honor in our communities, we would be a much happier lot of people.  Below are the honor codes from the various US Service Academies:

Honor Code from West Point:

“A cadet will not lie, cheat, steal, or tolerate those who do.”

Honor Code at the Air Force Academy:

“The bedrock of moral and character education at the United States Air Force Academy begins with a internalization of the cadet honor code. This code was created by cadets and is owned by cadets. They are responsible for maintaining the Code as well as for the process by which those who break it are assessed. The Code is based on a fundamental, positive principles of honesty, respect, fairness, and support.

Understanding the Code

Honor Code: We will not lie, steal, or cheat, nor tolerate among us anyone who does.

Honor Oath: We will not lie, steal, or cheat, nor tolerate among us anyone who does.  Furthermore, I resolve to do my duty and to live honorably, (so help me God).

Spirit of the Code: Do the right thing and live honorably.”

Honor Concept from the US Naval Academy:

“Midshipmen are persons of integrity: They stand for that which is right.

They tell the truth and ensure that the full truth is known. They do not lie.

They embrace fairness in all actions. They ensure that work submitted as their own is their own, and that assistance received from any source is authorized and properly documented. They do not cheat.

They respect the property of others and ensure that others are able to benefit from the use of their own property. They do not steal.”

Happy Veteran’s Day to all those who have lead and served and sacrifices for our freedom. Thank you.

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Give Yourselves A Cheer!

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I just want to thank you for sharing this wonderful life together. I hope your day brought you a smile or two.

I want to thank you for smiling when you read Here I Am and for sharing your thoughts and comments and letting me know you get something out of it.

Sometimes I wonder why I continue to share the highlights of my one life story every day.  Then one of you BeLoveRs call or text or comment or like one of my posts and you let me know that something touched your heart or you changed something that you’re doing and you share your happiness and journey with me. I love this. We’re connected. You keep me motivated to write and I thank you for this gift.

So cheers, my friends!  Continue to let your light shine and make this world a better place, one moment at a time.  xo

Choose Happiness

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This is it.

This guy summarized my existence.

I choose happiness as a way of living and being from minute to minute and share this daily journey with you so that we may practice the pursuit of happiness together.

My life is perfectly imperfect filled with the ups and downs, the yin and the yang, and the daily struggles and fears, just like yours, but not exactly of course, but you know what I mean.

We all get to choose how we react and adapt to what life delivers to us, sometimes fair and sometimes not, sometimes expected and sometimes not. We get to play our way. We don’t get to always choose what comes our way yet we can choose how we react and this is our personal power. I love this. Every minute is another opportunity to start again. Today is the beginning of the rest of our lives. How do we want to experience this wonderful one life we get to live?

The first part of this quote talks about releasing tension, which sounds like play or exercise to me. I’m sure there are several other ways, but these are the first two healthy options that come to mind. Did you do something to take care of yourself today?

I played volleyball with my girls in the sunshine and smiled and laughed and served hard serves and missed some hard hits. I high-fived my friends and shared some mixed nuts that Debbie brought to share that we all love. Thanks, Deb.

How about being present? When and how were you really present today? I’m highly distracted and not always present. This one was more challenging today as I was in a hurry. I was present when I was volunteering at the rummage sale and joking with Laura and April as we sorted through stuff together. I loved that Laura was really trying to sell us on her husband’s unused shirts and how she wanted us to take them home. I took her up on her offer – no shame! I loved that we had so many volunteers sorting and stacking and organizing and working together and that when I have a shout out to all of is for our hard work that everyone started clapping. I had fun joking around with everyone and seeing April picking out a pink dress Halloween costume and parading around in a little blue dress. I loved that we picked a rummage sale mascot from the piles, a little undressed dirty doll with freaked out crazy hair and “makeup” all over her face and head and body. She was the craziest thing we found and then it got even funnier when Laura asked is why her donation was sitting on the side with our personal belongings. Hahaha! That was funny.

Next on the list is amplifying love. What do you think that means? I think that means turning up the love and sharing it. Hmm… Did you practice that today? I have to think about that one… I make my husband laugh. Does that count? I like to de stress our household and am always being silly and laughing at myself and my own jokes which makes him laugh. I like to make him dance with me which usually lasts 30 seconds but puts us in both in a good mood. Maybe that counts…not sure though. Laughing is contagious and usually he’s soon laughing with me. I love when he makes me laugh too. Laughter definitely helps us to de stress and release tension — ooh, a two for one special!

Generating enthusiasm is next on the happiness list. Are you good at this? I am good at this most of the time, or at least I fool myself. I love being a cheerleader and encouraging everyone to play nicely together. And I love to get people excited to be doing what we’re doing, whatever it is we choose to do. Today I generated excitement amongst the rummage sale volunteers, cheering and clapping and thanking everyone for being there. I made fun of myself and the crazy donations, while being thankful for our generous community.

And finally gratitude. What were you thankful for today? Did you tell someone? I love being thanked and I love thanking others. I thanked April for going to Costco for me today and saving me some time and probably a ton of money. It’s so nice to have a wife! Everyone should have one. Thank you wifey!!

So that’s easy, isn’t it? We can develop these skills and practice this happiness thing every day, by being mindful, drinking 8 glasses of water and getting plenty of sleep for starters.

Be happy my friends. xoxoxo

Love is Louder – The ALS Ice Bucket Challenge Success

If you want to see love in action, just take a look at the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge.


We, as a community, are speaking up. We are accepting a challenge to connect, to raise awareness, to be giving, and loving and supportive and playful, and grateful.  We are creating compassion and we are doing something good that feels good and right, and not just for ourselves or our families or necessarily something close to home.  We are helping others and that helps heal us and creates happiness despite the pain and suffering that exists in its many forms. And ALS is just one of them.

Love wins.

There will be haters and nay-sayers, but when we are loving and authentic and share from our hearts, love and goodness wins.

ALS Awareness is also winning through our social media online campaign.  Just look at the numbers… over $42 million dollars has been raised in a month by thousands of new contributors.  That is CRAZY good.  I hope this sparks giving all over the place.

We as a society are winning by communicating and connecting and bridging the gaps between our humanity, across religious and political and financial and age differences, one at a time in our own little way.  Woohoo!!

It is amazing to be part of this wonderful movement, and not just for the awareness that our participation and sharing is bringing to ALS, but also to the connection and compassion and kindness we are sharing with one another.

What if we can learn from this successful social media online campaign and apply the lessons to other causes?

What has made this so successful?

Here are my takeaways, in no particular order:

1.  It started with a SPARK.  Pete Frates, a patient with a need, had an idea. He dared someone to take a fun, goofy challenge to create awareness and to raise money and gave them a specific time period to respond, within 24 hours, and asked them to spread the love by challenging friends, creating a personal connection.  He created an inferno!

2. A DARE.  When we are dared to do something, it’s like challenging us to step up. In this case, it was a fun dare that is possible and easy to do, and most everyone can participate without getting hurt (if you’re careful!! – of course there have been injuries)

3. A quick turn around TIME, within 24 hours. The challenge was action oriented, dump ice water on your head and/or donate to the cause within 24 hours. People can’t put it off to do later.

4. Social Media – we have the means to connect quickly via Facebook and Twitter and Email, etc.  People want to be part of something fun and good and it’s catchy. Sharing is caring.  We are connecting communities and feel like we can do something to create change by participating. We can be seen and we can be creative and we like those things.

5. It’s FUN.  It’s fun to be play and be silly and with all our busyness, it’s great to stop in a 24 hour period because we “have to” and to just be goofy.  We are given a pass to play because we accepted a dare.  It’s fun because of the anticipation of ice cold water being thrown on our head and waiting for the cold to chill and shock us and make us laugh and make those around us laugh. It’s like that carnival dunk tank game that makes us laugh every time the ball hits the target and the volunteer falls in the water. We laugh at this. We love the anticipation and clean, safe, fun that surrounds us and we want to play, participate and watch.

6. It’s POSITIVE and we can all connect and share and create community across communities. There is a lot of negative news and we’re tired as a nation of all the terrorism and racism and any other -ism. We need to laugh. We need to connect. We need to share some love and laughter, as a nation and across nations. We’re hurting as a society and we need to love one another. LOVE doesn’t see age, sex, fat, politics, religion, etc.

7. Happiness comes from GIVING. We give each other a challenge. We give each other a laugh. We give a little bit of money to help others. We give ourselves hope. We give each other some lovin’ and that’s a good thing.  Giving is a secret to creating happiness, not just for the receivers but also for the givers.

8.  It’s ENTERTAINMENT.  We use humor to lighten the stress. We use humor to connect with one another. And watching people dump ice cold water on each other or themselves is funny. We can laugh and connect with one another in this simple way, through a smile and a laugh.  And most everyone can participate in this challenge – young and old.  And we’re using humor to create awareness, love and compassion.  And we’re playing first, learning second, and giving third. Play is important.

9. It’s SIMPLE.  It’s easy to do and it’s engaging and quick. We maybe spent 20 minutes between finding a bucket and filling it with ice and water, rehearsing for a minute and recording the challenge. And then going online afterwards to http://www.als.org to donate.  It was fun, easy, quick and simple to do with my kids.  As a family, we played first, watched a video second and learned about what ALS is really about, and then donated money next.  The dare/challenge from a friend is what got us involved and interested in participating and we didn’t want to miss the 24 hour deadline.

10. The intention is AUTHENTIC and by participating and sharing, we make it PERSONAL. We thrive for authenticity and for what is real. This is a real need. There are real people dying and suffering with no cure.  ALS is a horrible, terrible disease that affects the patient and his/her family and community. And we all know someone that knows someone that is afflicted by this and we can feel empathy by sharing in the pain and feel like we can make a small difference.

I hope what this challenge does is helps to raise enough money and awareness so that a cure can be found for ALS and the conversation continues and those affected feel the love and compassion from all of us. I also hope that we continue to engage with one another, play with each other, focus on the positive, and continue to think of others and give money and time to those causes that need our attention, as often as possible.

We can make a difference. We can be the change we want to see in the world.  I dare you to take the challenge and play along and donate to www.als.org and to any other group or organization that needs some lovin’.  I dare ya!  xoxo

Namaste

Good Old Fashioned Service

I love good service. I love the kindness and connection that comes from people who love what they do and genuinely share their gifts and talents.

Today I had a nail stuck in my tire. I hate it when that happens. I wasn’t quite sure how to handle it. I googled how to remove a nail or screw and watched a youtube video, showing me how to repair my tire from home. I was almost tempted to do it myself. I thought it might be cool to learn something new. But then thought, if I didn’t do it right, I would have been stuck. So instead I went on yelp and looked for tire repairs near my house. I read a great review about an honest company and chose them just because other people trusted them and liked the people that worked there. 

This company was great.  I drove up without an appointment and they told me to pull my car up to the service bay. A guy came out and started jacking up the front of my car right away. He removed the lug nuts and took off the wheel in 2 minutes.  He took the screw out and sprayed water in the spot and nothing bubbled up. Yay! Good news – no puncture!  

He put the wheel back on and when his assistant came over to write up the charges, he said there weren’t any because there wasn’t a leak to repair.  Seriously?  No charges?  He didn’t even charge me for looking at it and removing the wheel.  I was surprised and thankful. While I was looking for a tip to give him, he disappeared.  I only had $2 or $20 in my wallet and I wanted to give him at least $10. I guess I’ll have to go back tomorrow to thank him.  The name of the company is Godinez Tires in Sunnyvale if you ever need good, honest service. And they have birds and chickens outside for your entertainment!

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The second great service we received was with our family dentist. Dr. Randall Murray is one of the nicest people I know. He is so kind and his leadership shines throughout his office. Everyone is friendly and loving and patient and kind. I’m not even exaggerating. When I called this morning with a broken tooth issue, the receptionist was so sweet and found a spot for us this afternoon. She had a big smile when she greeted us. As we waited in the waiting room, the hygienist came out to see how we were doing, sharing stories about the World Cup, giving the kids hugs and just hanging out with us for a few minutes.  Also while we were waiting, an oral surgeon dressed in his scrubs walked in with his patient to introduce her to Dr. Murray. He wanted to be sure she would be well taken care of. These are the type of people Dr. Murray associates with. He finds colleagues who are kind and caring and professional like he is. He referred us to our orthodontist, who is also just like him. They take the time to make a human, real connection, sharing their passion and talents and communicating with us in a way as if they are our friends and partners.  This is a great feeling and does create an awesome connection.  I never feel like he’s in a hurry or burdened by our requests. As he was looking at Juliana’s tooth, I mentioned that I would like him to check Charlie’s tooth too, as he had mentioned a chip but wasn’t complaining with pain. Dr. Murray took the time to look at his tooth, and realized right away that it would need work. By this time it was 4:15 and we were the last patient. He could have easily asked us to come back, but instead he decided to fix his tooth too right away without an appointment.  He said he had a cancellation and was happy to fix it. He went the extra mile and took care of us. We shared stories about our kids and summer vacation and graduation celebrations.  We sure got lucky to find such a great dentist and friend.  

I’m thankful for good old fashioned service where people still care.  

 

Teacher Appreciation

Tonight we were invited to attend Charlie’s Classroom Celebration and Open House. We received a formal invitation with all the important details, and of course we gladly attended.

We love Charlie’s teacher for so many reasons. We have a shared history, as we first met her when she came to our school as Christian’s second grade student teacher from Stanford. Lucky for our family, she was hired on that summer and became Christian’s 3rd grade teacher.  Juliana also then had her for 3rd and 4th grade.  When we returned from Amsterdam and found out that she would also be Charlie’s teacher, we were elated. I think we are the first family where she’s had all 3 siblings.

I asked Christian and Juliana to join us at the celebration, so that they could see their teacher again too.  This was pretty special to me.
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Charlie gave us a tour of his classroom and walked us around the room, pointing out all the important details. My favorite sites were the Word Clouds that the students created for each other.

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I love positive recognition and seeing the good in everyone. This activity empowered the kids to practice kindness and celebrating each other. They all seemed to like their individual highlights.

Charlie was most proud of his writing portfolio.  

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This year he joined the newspaper staff and every month worked on an article for the school paper. I loved seeing his skills develop and how proud he has been. He loves to write and has a natural talent for creating interesting stories that flow. He types them himself, using Google Docs, and emails them to his advisor all on his own. After all the articles are turned in, the team meets to peer review and edit the articles before submission for the final paper. He says this year he’s learned how to indent paragraphs, and to use quotation marks properly. I’m still amazed how much a 4th grader can do and love seeing him enjoy learning.

I am thankful for all the amazing teachers and staff at our school.  We have passionate, smart, empathetic, kind and loving teachers. Our principal has also been supportive and has created an open environment where the synergy between multicultural students, teachers, staff and parents has thrived and has created a wonderful community.

I am happy to be back home again, living in the same, ol’ neighborhood, and getting to enjoy these last two years of elementary school at “our” school.

Love this life. Love our teachers. Thank you.  

Teacher Appreciation Week

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This week is Teacher Appreciation Week at school.  I love that students and families are taking time to slow down and be thankful for our teachers and staff.

There is a schedule of appreciation at our school, should you choose to participate.

Monday – Shower with flowers or Healthy Snacks

Tuesday – Teacher/ Staff Luncheon – Donated food items

Wednesday – Parent Notes of Appreciation

Thursday – Classroom Supplies Donations

Friday – Student Notes or Gift of Appreciation

It’s fun to see everyone walking in with different treats. Charlie brought some type of chocolate covered Goji berries yesterday.

Today we prepared a green salad and served at the teacher luncheon. My favorite part was chatting with the other volunteers and sharing stories.

Our school has a great community of students, teachers, parents and staff. It’s a wonderful place to raise kids and to be part of such a loving community. I am thankful for all that everyone contributes to make our school and society a wonderful place to learn and grow up.

Love this life.

Namaste.

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