Teetering

Posted in Uncategorized by adrianahartley

I tend to share the ups on the teeter-totter of life.

I thought I’d share a teetering moment as I try to find my balance again.

I am transitioning from a stay at home mom to a part time working mom and I don’t have it quite figured out yet.

I am trying to let go of some of the expectations from my previous path as I journey on down this new road and it’s a bit bumpy, as I want to do it all.

I think there is always chaos in the transition and once I master the steps, it’ll seem easy again. But right now I feel the stress and it’s ok, it just is and I have two pimples on my face as proof.

I’ve decided my priorities are:

1. My family. I want to cook and to pick kids up from school and drive them where they need to go. I want to be present when they are home and be able to listen and share stories together while we can.

2. Exercise. I have to exercise for my sanity. It’s a requirement that’s not negotiable and I keep forgetting this. Today I remembered and it felt so good, especially on a Monday.

3. My work. I’m excited about my new job and creating something new and being part of a great team. I like using my brain and like that I’m actually making money again, after 15 years of volunteering.

4. My clean house. I need order and chaos under control in my outer environment to maintain my inner sanity. This is teetering today but I’ll get it back in order before I go to bed.

5. My girlfriends. I need them. They are my emotional support and I love sharing our stories together.

6. My volunteer commitments. I still love giving back to my community and this one is a little bit harder now. Today I let go of one of my commitments and it did not feel good. I can’t continue in the role I had and work too, at least not right now. I’m ok with the decision now, but in the moment I struggled.

7. My writing. I’m still enjoying this outlet and love that so many of you find a connection with me and share your ideas and comments. I may try writing at different times of the day and maybe skipping a day or two, to let go of the pressure and expectation to produce new content daily. We’ll see. I’m not ready to change this process just yet, but I don’t want to teeter too long.

I like balance, amidst the yin and the yang.

How about you? Are you feeling centered or are you teetering too? Are there things you need to change and burdens you need to let go to find your core again? Change is good. Embrace it and enjoy the ride.

xoxo thanks for reading xoxo

17Aug2014

Anxiety and Back to School

Posted in Uncategorized by adrianahartley

You’d think I’d be excited for the kids to go back to school tomorrow, yet I’m filled with anxiety and mixed feelings.

Of course, I’m ready for my “vacation” to begin, as we’ve had a ton of togetherness these past ten weeks, yet I’m filled with a sense of loss and I always feel like this before a big change.

I start seriously nesting and feeling like I have to reorganize, sort and declutter and buy everything new. We bought new shoes for all three kids today for their first day tomorrow. I think it’s cute that they picked matching Vans.

Backpacks are filled and we’ve got special snacks for back to school filled lunch bags.

We started reading more and practicing Chemistry. Just a little more practice so they aren’t too rusty before returning to “work.”

New outfits have been laid out and we had a relatively quiet day, just spending the day together as a family before the mad dash at 6 am tomorrow morning.

I’m planning on making breakfast burritos when they wake up and take pictures before they head off.

And to fend off the anxiety, I got out a board game to play with the younger two before we ended the day. We had fun playing a couple rounds of Sequence.

I know all will be well and they will find their new ways, and hopefully their paths will be smooth with the right classes and good teachers and good friends. I will miss them being home as much as I’ll enjoy the quiet and fewer messes. It’s that yin and yang thing again and feeling of being conflicted. And so it goes.

God bless all the children and mamas and papas as they transition this week and always. Life is a series of transitions. We should be getting good at these!! :-). And thank you to all the teachers we trust to guide and teach our children everyday and the community that supports us along the way.

Have a good school year, everyone!

Namaste

22Jan2014

Ten Little Things

Posted in Uncategorized by adrianahartley

Sometimes when you’re feeling a little down, you’ve got to look at what’s good instead of feeling sorry for yourself. I’m in one of those transitioning life moments and instead of feeling bad about it, I want to discover ways to keep moving forward and how to quickly get out of my funk, focusing on gratitude.

So I’m going to share what was good today. I’m already smiling just thinking this way.

1. I got to play tennis twice today. I felt like I was at summer camp where you get to play all day.
2. I was thankful to be playing tennis at rush hour and not in a car stuck in traffic.
3. I have a great community of friends that support one another and I’m thankful that Ling gave my kids a ride tonight.
4. My little one wrapped his arms around my neck and told me I was the best mom ever.
5. The sunshine was so warm today and made my skin feel hot. I loved that!
6. I got to FaceTime with my niece and hear her cute little laugh and watch her brush her teeth and feel like I was part of her night time routine.
7. My kids were playing basketball together and I got to watch.
8. In the carpool ride home from school with 5 high school kids, one of the boys sincerely asked me how my day was. There is hope for humanity!
9. I made breakfast for dinner and everyone loved it.
10. I had two hours of quiet time while the kids were at school to catch up on emails and paperwork.

That felt so good! If you’re feeling funky, stop and make a little gratitude list. It’ll make you feel so much better and maybe a small smile will sneak out too.

13Aug2013

High School Orientation

Posted in Uncategorized by adrianahartley

Today Christian attended high school orientation all afternoon, followed by a pep rally where parents were also invited to attend.

Being in the gym, surrounded by eager freshman and encouraging and thoughtful upperclassmen, as well as kind administrators still didn’t make me feel quite ready for the experience. I am fully aware that this stage is the beginning of the end. He’ll always be my baby, but it’s time for him to grow up and learn independence and to be with his friends. I just pray he finds a great group of guys to enjoy the experience together and stays out of trouble, study’s hard and does good work.

He did great today! And I think I did ok too!! Good luck, CJ. Live it up!!