Coffee Break?

I’m so happy the kids are back at school. Did you just raise your glass to cheer me?  Thank you! Cheers to you too.

I actually felt really sad when everyone left to go back to school. For a few minutes. Maybe a little more than a few. I felt the loss of their constant presence, but then of course I wanted to jump for joy.  You know, that yin and yang thing again?  I loved them being home. Yet I longed for quiet and structure and less dishes and laundry and my own agenda and not 4 other people with different ideas. I know you get it.

When everyone is home, there is more chaos, and I have more work to do thank usual. It’s just that the work and demands are constant and there doesn’t seem to be a break. At least when everyone goes to school and work, I can clean up and get things in order and they stay that way at least for a couple hours, and it’s quiet and peaceful. I can workout and shower, shop and volunteer and be back again to do pick up and homework help and taxi driver duties.  I like that little respite and long for it, which is why I was happy when everyone went back to their business and I could do mine.

It’s weird to me though, because I think I want us all together and I do, but then I long for a break again. Maybe that’s normal. I don’t want a long break. Just enough to get everything back in order again – to restock the fridge, cook a little with no one walking in the kitchen and interrupting or making their own food, and getting all the clutter back to where it belongs.  

2015/01/img_4013.jpgplaying with carrots before roasting them tonight

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As I put it into words, I feel a bit neurotic, because I’m a stay at home mom who wants to be home with her family, yet I want them to all go away? That’s weird. I don’t really want them to go away for long, but I already mentioned that. I think you get it.

So once everyone went back, I got back to my normal and that felt really good. I have a routine again and this routine provides structure to my days. I know what to expect and things just kinda flow.  I feel like I can do my job and this gives me purpose and I feel successful, if that makes any sense.

I am thankful for my family and my job and my quiet time and when they all come back into the mix again. I love my people and I wouldn’t change a thing. I love our togetherness, and I now know that I also need some space and I think that’s healthy. We all need a coffee break.

Can you relate?

Life is good.  What provides structure and purpose in your life?