You’re Bugging Me!

Think of someone who bugs you. Think about what this person does that irritates you.  Then think about how what you don’t like in that person is probably something you don’t like in yourself. Isn’t that a weird twist? But really, try it. It’s the craziest thing.

I tried it on my run today. I thought about how Charlie has been bugging me all week and how irritated I’ve been. I kept telling him that’s he’s harassing me and to leave me alone and to stop nagging me all day.  Then, today I decided to think about what motivates him to act the way he does and why does it bug me so much, and then I figured it out.

He asks me questions incessantly because he wants to know what to expect and he wants control over his young life.  He doesn’t have all the answers and he wants structure and wants to look ahead and wants his needs met and his needs are different than my needs at any given moment. He needs me to fit into his world and not the other way around. We have been clashing and he’s been BUGGING me.

Instead of being bugged today, I decided to listen more patiently and to provide more clear answers. I finally realized that he needs to know what to expect and he’s very uncomfortable not knowing what’s coming next and I get to hear about it every minute. Well, at least it feels like every minute.

Today I practiced giving him more concrete answers. I gave him structure. I gave him boundaries. I gave him expectations. And he was content. Miraculously, he stopped bugging me. Well, at least until the next need popped up, but I didn’t overreact (as much) the next time and the next time.

I realized that I am a lot like him. I like to know what to expect and I like to plan and to fill my day. Huh. What I don’t like him doing, is the same thing that I do. Strange. That was an interesting experiment. I wonder if I can get credit for that assignment.

Okay, your turn. Who bugs you and why? Do you have the same traits somewhere hidden? Hmm…. such a curiosity!!

Good luck and I wish you peace with all who are bugging you!!



Everyone is so busy. We don’t have time because we are busy. Really?

I don’t buy that.  We create our own busyness and put up our own boundaries and definitions. Pa-lease! We are not really THAT busy. Yes, we are busy. But… there is always a but.

We create our own frameworks and our own ways of thinking. No one is really that busy that we don’t have time for joy. Think about it. Maybe the President is busy, but he still finds time to get to Hawaii, or to play with his dogs and kids. We’re not that busy. We’re just pretending to be and feeling really important.

What if we change our minds?

I was thinking about this today.  I was thinking about how we think and what we tell ourselves when we are alone.

What does your self talk sound like? Are you positively talking to yourself? Are you happy when you’re thinking? Are you thinking about finding and discovering joy in the little moments and minutes in between your busyness? Do you give yourself permission?

I do. I believe in the pursuit of happiness and being happy just because we can. Every day, even when we’re busy or sick or tired.  I think like that. Yes, I’m weird, but I’m pretty happy too because I choose to and want to be happy despite the chaos and craziness and imperfections of life. I want to fill in the cracks with joyspace. Yep, that’s what I’m calling it. I don’t know if it’s a word, but now it is. It’s mine and yours and we need to fill our joyspace in between our busy moments. It’s easy. You just have to be aware and to think about wanting to create and find joy when you have a little minute and then you surprisingly will. Trust me. It works. And it’s contagious. 🙂

I’ll share a few of my little moments of joyspace today while I was “so” busy.

I was shopping at Ranch 99 for stuff to make an Indonesian dinner tonight and this store is so fascinating. Look at the strange crackers I found…

These crab crackers were in the snack aisle…eeewe!  But they made me ponder and think how different we all are – from foods, to the way we spend our time, to the way we think and worship and play and all that good stuff. I couldn’t believe this was considered something yummy, but we all have different tastes and I found joy in appreciating this crab concept.

I also noticed the music that was playing while I was shopping. It wasn’t what you would typically hear in MUSAK – it was Chinese music and it was fitting and noticeably different and made me smile while I was shopping and weaving in and out of traffic… it’s very crowded in there!

When I came home with my groceries, I noticed all the different flowers blooming in my yard and felt the presence of spring!

It’s quickly approaching and made me smile.

Don’t forget to spring your clocks forward on Sunday!

First rose bud has bloomed.

I can’t wait for longer hours of sunshine to fill more joyspace.  I loved noticing the changes in the garden.

I chose today to cook a fun and messy dinner and to not worry or rush into doing the dishes.

Indonesian/ Chinese dinner just because…

The dishes are still sitting on the table, but I’ll get to them before I go to bed. Instead I filled the time helping Charlie with his math homework and laughing with Jeff at the dinner table with the kids. We made time for each other, even though we’re “so” busy. Everyone has time for 15 minutes together, even if we don’t think so.

So those are just some of the ways I found and created joys in between the busyness and chaos of life. It’s all how we look at it and choose to make time for joy.

How did you make time for joy today? What did your joyspace look like? I’m curious.


Wishing you peace and joy amidst your busyness! Namaste.