HFSS

I am HFSS – Happy For Simple Stuff! 

Remember how I shared that I am seeking rhythm to my life? It’s coming!! I can feel it.  I like to do a lot of stuff and fill my days and I just added full time work to the mix. Now I need help to do it all, and I’m not that good at asking, but I’m practicing and it’s working.

I got up early this morning and enjoyed snuggles and coffee in bed before making French toast for breakfast for everyone and prepping dinner.

  
 I then got an hour+ of work in before the kids went off to school. My friend dropped them off for me today, which gave me extra time for which I was thankful.

I then picked up the house a bit and started a load of laundry before meeting my friend for a hike at our favorite place.  I asked my new work partner for help, while I was gone and she was a Godsend!  I enjoyed a gorgeous and slightly wet, and slightly muddy  trek, out in nature, finding joy being out in nature.

   
    
 

I was able to work for another several hours afterwards before leaving again for the first swim meet of the season. 

  

I am thankful for a flexible job that allows me to work and play and be with my family and swirl it all together.  The swim meet ran longer than I expected and I had to ask for help at my volunteer job and also of my husband to start the dinner I had earlier prepped. I was very happy to be able to be with my kids, enjoying their competitive sports and sitting with my friends in the bleachers.

I came home with the big kids to find dinner cooking on the stove, with my husband in the kitchen and I jumped for joy. Literally! I asked for help and he delivered. HFSS.

  
Because he was able to help with dinner, the big kids had a healthy meal and were able to come home, eat and run again.  Christian is able to drive them now so I got to sit home and enjoy a quick meal with my honey. HFSS.

This is the best day. I love how things flowed and I found a rhythm to do it all with a little help from my friends and family. Now, back to work! I have a few things to wrap up before getting some rest.

How was your rhythm today? Did you live it up?

Life is good!

nAMaste

Ask

Are you good at asking for what you want?

Maybe you want a raise. Maybe you want some thing. And maybe you want time to spend with some one. Or maybe you need help.

Are you afraid to ask? Are you able to ask freely and do you get what you need?

I am afraid to ask.

I don’t like to ask for help.

I don’t like to ask for things.

I don’t like to ask for attention.

But I need help. I need things. And I need to spend time with my friends and loved ones.

For some reason, I struggle with asking and feel vulnerable. I also don’t want to inconvenience others, but I need others. Why is it so hard to ask?

Sometimes my needs are greater than other days and instead of asking, I beat around the bush. I hint. I suggest. Or I demand, which isn’t so nice. Sometimes I’m indirect or act like a martyr or even expect others to read my mind. Not proud, but true. I am still learning and practicing.

Last weekend, I wanted my husband to pay attention to me. I wanted him to want to do something with me, besides driving the kids to sports or cleaning up the house. I wanted him to want me more than I particularly wanted anything and I didn’t care what we did. I just wanted the BIG A. Attention. I hate when I get like that.  It’s not like he doesn’t want to give me A, he just isn’t always reading my mind or thinking the same thing as I am. Confusing, right?  I know.

So I blew it. I wasn’t nice and I couldn’t come up with a sweet suggestion, like, “Hey, do you want to go for a walk together?” or “Hey, do you think you might like to go for a drive, or shopping for a new couch today?” That would be asking, and I don’t feel comfortable asking for attention. Instead, it came out all wrong. It came out as an attack, like, “WHY DON’T YOU WANT TO DO ANYTHING WITH ME??” and I think he thought I was crazy. He was probably right. But of course I thought he was wrong.  My entire delivery was wrong, and I messed up things and caused a big argument. And arguments are not the kind of attention or connection I crave.

It took me a little while to figure it out. Struggles are like that when you’re in them.  I realized if I had just asked, he probably would have obliged. I didn’t want to ask. I wanted him to ask, but that wasn’t even on his mind and wasn’t what he needed. Why did I expect him to want the same things I wanted? If I had listened to what he wanted to do, I might have been more open-minded. But I wasn’t.  I decided to practice this life moment the hard way.  I don’t recommend it. 😉

Luckily I have a great, life partner, who actually gets me, just not always in the moment. Heck, I don’t always understand my self in those moments either. I was able to calm down and apologize and he was able to tell me I should probably ask a little differently and reminded me how much he loved me.  And all was well in the world again. I’m still learning… how to ask. Gosh, I thought this would be easy by now! 🙂

  
Have a good weekend!