Practical Jokes

I love practical jokes and watching America’s Funniest Home Videos. I love good-natured pranks.

Today I took Charlie out on a date, just the two of us. He wanted to get his hair cut and wanted a bubble tea and a roti bun. I offered him a milk shake or whatever treat he wanted, and he chose Honey Berry.  I smiled at his Silicon Valley choice.  How many Caucasian kids pick Taiwanese tea-based pearl drinks as their preferred treat? Gotta love it.

We drove over to Honey Berry and ordered his after school snacks and sat down to chat for a little while before heading out for his hair cut, because who wants hair falling in your Roti?  As we were sitting there, I looked out the window and there was a group of about 5 young teens hanging outside. Instead of hanging on the sidewalk, they decided to lean up against my car. This made me uncomfortable and I wanted them to move, but I didn’t want any conflict and I wanted to just enjoy my date.

I sat in this uncomfortable state for a minute, hoping they would leave on their own, but they didn’t. Charlie and I were talking about what to do. I had a plan. I told him to watch as I got out my key and pressed the lock button twice. I was hoping that the clicking sound, the flashing lights and the slight beeping sound would get their attention. It didn’t work. So I decided to see what the Panic button would do. Don’t you always wonder what the red panic button is for?

 

I shared a sip of his tea and surreptitiously and slowly pressed the panic button and watched them jump. I then proceeded to laugh out loud, hiding behind a bite of his roti bun, acting like nothing happened.  Charlie wondered why I was laughing so hard. They didn’t know it was our car. I loved watching two of the kids jump and the other kids laughing at the jumpers. They all decided to move on their own.  Wasn’t that great?

Conflict avoided. Laughter filled my belly. Stay off other peoples’ cars. Duh.

Life is good.

Ask

Are you good at asking for what you want?

Maybe you want a raise. Maybe you want some thing. And maybe you want time to spend with some one. Or maybe you need help.

Are you afraid to ask? Are you able to ask freely and do you get what you need?

I am afraid to ask.

I don’t like to ask for help.

I don’t like to ask for things.

I don’t like to ask for attention.

But I need help. I need things. And I need to spend time with my friends and loved ones.

For some reason, I struggle with asking and feel vulnerable. I also don’t want to inconvenience others, but I need others. Why is it so hard to ask?

Sometimes my needs are greater than other days and instead of asking, I beat around the bush. I hint. I suggest. Or I demand, which isn’t so nice. Sometimes I’m indirect or act like a martyr or even expect others to read my mind. Not proud, but true. I am still learning and practicing.

Last weekend, I wanted my husband to pay attention to me. I wanted him to want to do something with me, besides driving the kids to sports or cleaning up the house. I wanted him to want me more than I particularly wanted anything and I didn’t care what we did. I just wanted the BIG A. Attention. I hate when I get like that.  It’s not like he doesn’t want to give me A, he just isn’t always reading my mind or thinking the same thing as I am. Confusing, right?  I know.

So I blew it. I wasn’t nice and I couldn’t come up with a sweet suggestion, like, “Hey, do you want to go for a walk together?” or “Hey, do you think you might like to go for a drive, or shopping for a new couch today?” That would be asking, and I don’t feel comfortable asking for attention. Instead, it came out all wrong. It came out as an attack, like, “WHY DON’T YOU WANT TO DO ANYTHING WITH ME??” and I think he thought I was crazy. He was probably right. But of course I thought he was wrong.  My entire delivery was wrong, and I messed up things and caused a big argument. And arguments are not the kind of attention or connection I crave.

It took me a little while to figure it out. Struggles are like that when you’re in them.  I realized if I had just asked, he probably would have obliged. I didn’t want to ask. I wanted him to ask, but that wasn’t even on his mind and wasn’t what he needed. Why did I expect him to want the same things I wanted? If I had listened to what he wanted to do, I might have been more open-minded. But I wasn’t.  I decided to practice this life moment the hard way.  I don’t recommend it. ;-)

Luckily I have a great, life partner, who actually gets me, just not always in the moment. Heck, I don’t always understand my self in those moments either. I was able to calm down and apologize and he was able to tell me I should probably ask a little differently and reminded me how much he loved me.  And all was well in the world again. I’m still learning… how to ask. Gosh, I thought this would be easy by now! :-)

  
Have a good weekend!

 

 

 

 

 

Thankful Thursday

Every day we should stop to really think about our true gifts, especially the ones we don’t always recognize but are right there too.

Tonight I challenge you to think about something or someone who is bugging you.  And then I want you to turn your thoughts around and think about why you’re lucky to have that person or that particular problem. Try and list three things you’re thankful for about your current situation. Maybe even write down your thoughts so you can see your gratitude on paper. See if your feelings change after you practice gratitude. It works for me.

Count your blessings, not your gaps. What we focus our attention and minds on is what we create. 

nAMaste

Super Bowl 50

We live near Levi Stadium and there is a lot of hype about this big event. It’s kind of strange to listen and to wait and to watch and to anticipate what is going to happen.

Everyone is talking about it.  Some people were talking about renting out their homes for thousands of dollars.  A ticket sold on Stub Hub for $28,000 tonight!! And then a lady from Milpitas won two tickets to the game in a local raffle.

There is talk about road closures and a million more people in this crowded valley over the weekend.

Some friends have travelled up to the city for the NFL Experience and Super Bowl City. Some are even braving the commute this weekend to party like rock stars at the free One Republic concert, planning different means of transportation including Uber, and BART. 

I think we’ll pretend there’s a blizzard and shop now for our chips and dip and hide indoors and watch from inside. Maybe we’ll open our windows and hear Lady Gaga’s half time show or maybe even the fireworks.

What about you? Are you thinking about the Super Bowl? 

Good night and may the best team win!!